*Bai Li*

I felt an urgent need to hug Xin Lei, but it was better to stop myself rather than turning my cheek red with her palm print.

I snorted. "You are knee-deep in your own problems."

I heard her tapping quickly. "So are you, but you are still helping me, right? Then I can too."

She was learning to give good comebacks.

I shrugged. "Your father and brother would kill me if something happens to their baby daughter/sister."

"They won\'t. They both work for justice, so they understand the meaning of standing on justice\'s side."

I gave up.

"Do whatever you want."

I don\'t know if it was my imagination, but I heard a soft chuckle.

I closed my eyes.

Perhaps because Xin Lei asked me why I had to leave the army, I dreamt about that day of my court-martial.

I was standing in the defendant\'s box.

"Major Bai Li." I heard the stern voice of the military judge. "You are accused of killing a civilian in the line of your duty. You also missed the trail of the criminal named Rodey after whom we were chasing for a long time, resulting in the trail going cold. What do you have to say in your defense?"

I stood straight, unperturbed.

"Your Honour, I chased Rodey in the container terminal. It was all according to the plan. There were supposed to be no civilians around there because I had mapped out that place after careful thinking knowing that gunfire was inevitable. Rodey being cunning, I couldn\'t afford to have collateral damage."

The judge said, "Yet, your shot hit a civilian. So that means a civilian was present, and your plan failed."

I was silent. "My plan was full proof. There were no chances of any civilian being there."

I heard Major General Shi Jianguo\'s voice. "Your Honour, it is possible that Rodey may have got an inkling to his plan. And it is suspicious how a civilian got there in the first place."

The judge then asked, "What did you find about the reason for Tan Ye\'s presence?"

Immediately after, I heard General Song Xiaosheng\'s voice. "Your Honour, I have investigated and questioned Tan Ye\'s family. They said that he was there to unload a cargo truck. He was on duty."

I said, "This isn\'t logical. How can a single man be on duty? It is not a one-person job to unload a big cargo truck of its goods on his own. If he was on duty, then there should be at least two other workers on duty too."

General Song said, "Negative on that Major. We have also checked Tan Ye\'s phone records. He indeed got a message from his boss to be present at the time."

"Is the boss here to give his testimony?"

Soon, I heard his name called out.

"Your Honour, it is true. I told Tan Ye to visit the container terminal that day."

I narrowed my eyes. "That terminal hasn\'t been used for like months."

"No. It\'s in use; though I do admit that there was a period where it was at a standstill. The market was down, so it affected the supply and demand chain of goods. That\'s why, for some time, we didn\'t have much work."

"Why only Tan Ye?" The judge asked.

"We got an urgent requirement from a customer. It wasn\'t something that required two or more men, so I thought Tan Ye was enough."

I heard the judge say, "Major Bai Li, although you might have been well planned, you should have checked the latest status of the container\'s operations."

I said, "And there was no mistake. If there were even the slightest chance of it being operational, I would have immediately dropped my plan."

I heard a sigh. It was the General. "Major, it is not only about your failure in executing it, but also that you shot Tan Ye. With your latest psychology report that I see, you are still suffering from PTSD."

Bullshit!

I took a deep breath. "I don\'t suffer from PTSD anymore."

"You are. The mission where you lost your eyesight in the bomb blast is still affecting you."

"It is not." I was adamant.

The judge said, "Major Bai Li, an army officer killing a civilian, even if it is accidental, is a serious crime. It will wreak havoc among the citizens if they know that the army which is supposed to protect the citizens is responsible for a death."

I laughed. "What do you want to say, Your Honour?"

There were a few moments of silence, and then he said, "You have become a liability, Major Bai Li. The fact that you cannot see will hamper all your missions. You have trained hard to overcome it, and I admire that, but we cannot afford to lose lives. If you had your sight, you might not have killed Rodey, but you wouldn\'t have killed Tan Ye, either."

Liability. Fourteen years of service and I was a liability now. I suddenly felt cheated.

But, I said nothing.

Major General said, "Your Honour! Bai Li is an exemplary soldier. The injuries that soldiers get during their mission is like a medal to them. How can you be so insensitive in blaming him?"

"Major General, please control your emotions."

I couldn\'t hear what the Major General said. Maybe they were expecting me to throw a fit, to get mad about insulting me, but I kept quiet.

"I have nothing to say," I said.

The judge said, "Tan Ye\'s family already knows that you, a soldier, killed him. We have to give them justice. So, we cannot be lenient on you."

I smiled. "Say it, Your Honour."

I knew what was going to happen. The tone, the tension in the voice, gave it all away.

"Major Bai Li, on account of killing a civilian, losing our enemy\'s trail, and considering your PTSD, this court finds that you are not fit to stay as a soldier anymore. The court strips you of all the rights to serve the Chinese Army. The court doesn\'t give you a sentence, taking note of the fourteen years of your dedicated and loyal service to our country. So, the court has decided to give you a dishonorable discharge."