The car remained deathly quiet on the trip back to Killian\'s but he held my hand like he always did. We pulled into his driveway and he hit the button for the garage.

"You okay?"

I turned. "I\'m not sure."

"I\'ll let you out and we can go inside and talk."

We needed to talk. About many things. I\'d spoken to Killian about my parents and sister. He listened, but had offered very little about his personal history. This was so wrong.

I followed him, my hand held tightly in his grip. He sat on the couch and brought me into his side.

"You\'re angry that I didn\'t tell you about Michael?" His voice was whisper soft.

I looked at the pain in Killian\'s eyes. "I\'m not angry, I\'m hurt. Why didn\'t you tell me? Did you think I\'d react badly? Did you think I\'d have a problem with your brother\'s disability?" I couldn\'t go on because anger was slipping into my voice.

"God, no," Killian said while pulling me closer. "It\'s difficult for me to talk about Michael. I knew you would care about him as much as I do."

I felt tears behind my eyes.

"Then why?"

"Because it\'s painful."

He wasn\'t saying more, so I needed to move this farther along. "How old is Michael?"

"Twenty-five. He was born on March sixteenth."

Fuck. Killian\'s birthday.

"He\'s my twin brother."

Michael had the body of a twelve year old. He couldn\'t talk or move his arms more than a few inches. Shit, the first tear slipped down my face. Killian kissed it away.

"What happened?"

I watched Killian\'s chest expand as he took in a large supply of air.

"Michael was the troublemaker of the two of us." Killian\'s dimples flashed. "I know that\'s hard to believe, but even my mother will back my story. We vacationed at a cabin on the river when we were nine. My parents saved money for two years so we could have that one special week. There were rocky cliffs several hundred yards away that partially circled a swimming hole. A large sign with, "Danger, no jumping," printed on it signaled the danger. My dad told us he would skin us alive if we jumped from those cliffs."

Crap, my heart took a plunge because I knew what was coming.

"At around five on the first morning, Michael woke me up and dared me to jump off the cliffs with him. I usually got my ass tanned right along with him because I never refused a dare and he knew it. The sun was barely coming up and my parents were sleeping. I was scared. I remember looking at that sign and thinking we shouldn\'t jump-but we did."

Killian looked away from me and I squeezed his hand. When he glanced back, there was so much pain. I felt more tears slip down my face.

His voice was choked. "I came up and Michael didn\'t. At first, I thought he was playing a practical joke, but then I knew something was terribly wrong. I started diving under and searching for him. I\'d come up for air and scream for help then dive back under. The water was so dark, but finally I touched him and tried to pull upward. My lungs almost burst and I had to breathe. I let him go and went up for air, leaving him down there. I made it down to Michael again, and my dad was finally there helping to pull him up. He was completely blue when he came out of the water. My dad started CPR and my mother helped. I sat next to him, holding his lifeless hand, begging him to come back."

A sob escaped my lips.

"Shh, baby, don\'t cry." Killian pulled me in even closer and rocked me in his arms. "It happened a long time ago. My mother and I survived. My father left a year later. He couldn\'t take the pain of seeing Michael every day. He never blamed me, but I know he blamed himself. Michael was on life support for months. My father wanted the machines turned off, but my mom refused."

There were so many things going through my head.

Killian holding my hand and his subconscious desire to touch.

A nine-year-old child faced with death or letting go of his brother.

Killian\'s childish insecurities and even his anger.

It all made sense now, and, god, I loved him.

We stayed locked together until we changed our position and settled full length on the couch. Killian spoke about his brother before the accident. One scrape after anothertwo boys completely inseparable. He made me laugh in between more tears. Killian\'s mother was simply amazing.

"I had to support them. I needed to play professionally so Michael and my mom would always be cared for. I had to complete each pass, make every touchdown, and win games. There was no other option."

This was such a different picture than what I woke up with this morning.

"Has Michael ever gone to any of your games?"

"I\'ve never tried. He doesn\'t do well in crowds. But, god, does he get excited watching football on television. I had the skybox seats put in my contract in case he could come someday. I\'m just afraid of what would happen, and I couldn\'t ask my mom to bring him. She worries about me too much and doesn\'t enjoy watching. Most of my teammates have met Michael at one time or another. I don\'t keep him a secret, but they\'re guys and don\'t ask the hard questions. I needed to tell you everything."

"Thank you for telling me."

"It\'s also the reason it took a month to contact you after we met. Michael was in the hospital because of a respiratory infection."

Things. It wasn\'t another woman; it was Michael.

Killian kissed the top of my head. "I\'m worn out. Let\'s go to bed."

He made love to me. If I thought Thursday night was mind-blowing, I was wrong.

Tonight, Killian MacGregor rocked my universe.